I picked up some colors the other day and created this picture. The first thing I noticed was that I had painted it in the style of my past. This is how I drew or painted back in the late 60’s and early 70’s. Psychedelic Art was fascinating to me back then. A kaleidoscope of colors in abstract form found me painting posters of musicians. The ones I favored most were Bob Dylan, Joan Baez, Francois Hardy, Jimi Hendrix and Donovan. I remember the next door neighbor had a garage that was run down and not in use. I took advantage of this fact and would take my paints and poster paper into the garage and paint to my heart’s content. The run down building with broken windows, peeling paint sans garage door played into my fantasy of poor, starving artist perfectly!
Now, many years later, I find myself fascinated with colors again. An array of colors that speak to me of spirit, energy, auras and slipping away to play among a myriad of stars. Vibrant violet, orange, red and gold are the colors that sing to me of Love, Peace and Tranquility.
And finally, when I see spirit in everything… I will find balance and be free to soar. A Blackbird told me so…
I had a ‘thought flash’ the other day which got me thinking about my youth and possible influences I was exposed to without really searching them out. Age 13 up to age 16 seems, to me, to be a time when young people start making their own choices about the music they listen to, the books they read and how they perceive art. My awareness years were between 1966 and 1969. The three people that caught my attention during this period were Bob Dylan, Gunter Grass and Andy Warhol. One wonders whether the impressions these three made upon me at that young age have remained intact throughout the years till this present day. A question that will probably be left unanswered because as we mature and begin to mix socially, we are constantly being swayed, and sometimes not, by others’ thoughts, beliefs and opinions. As we grow physically, mentally and spiritually we can only look back to those first days when we experimented with the influences of musicians, artists, writers and poets. Some of us will make use of what we learned from them, good or bad, and some of us won’t.
“Destiny is a feeling you have that you know something about yourself nobody else does. The picture you have in your own mind of what you’re about will come true. It’s a kind of a thing you kind of have to keep to your own self, because it’s a fragile feeling, and you put it out there, then someone will kill it. It’s best to keep that all inside.” – Bob Dylan (The Bob Dylan Scrapbook, 1956-1966)
Today I know that everything watches, that nothing goes unseen, and that even wallpaper has a better memory than ours. It isn’t God in His Heaven that sees all. A kitchen chair, a coat-hanger, a half-filled ash tray, or the wooden replica of a woman named Niobe, can perfectly well serve as an unforgetting witness to every one of our acts. – Gunter Grass (The Tin Drum)
When people are ready to, they change. They never do it before then, and sometimes they die before they get around to it. You can’t make them change if they don’t want to, just like when they do want to, you can’t stop them. – Andy Warhol
I have never been one to dwell on the past much but lately I have been thinking about that younger me. The young girl who slowly disappeared over a lifelong journey of work, marriage, children and living.. I guess it all started the day I got married and changed my name. One minute I was standing there as Grady and then with a simple affirmation of ‘I do’….. I was gone.
A Blackbird whispered in my ear the other day telling me to bring Grady back into my life. To go in search of that young girl who started out so many years ago. The girl with Love, Passion and Adventure shining like stars in her eyes. This blog is a way of going back and finding that younger me, the fun-loving Free Spirit. I may be older and somewhat wiser but she still has so much more to give me…. hence Searching for Grady.